Have you been thinking about a person and then run into them at the store? Or have you slipped your hand into your jeans pocket to find a twenty dollar bill, at the perfect moment that you’re a little short on cash? How about finding a lost book in the spot that you swear you had already looked and then reading just the right passage to make a difference in the direction of your day?
Are these random events or is this synchronicity? The answer really depends on how you view your inner and outer experiences. It is much easier though, to tap into the synchronicity in life, when you are connected to your source.
Synchronicity is defined as the occurrence of two or more events that appear to be meaningfully related but not causally related. Synchronicity holds that such events are “meaningful coincidences”. This concept has been around for 95 years, since Carl Jung first defined it.
Whatever its cause, the appeal of synchronicity runs deep. “People love mysterious things, and synchronicity is like magic happening to them,” says Carolyn North, author of Synchronicity: The Anatomy of Coincidence “It gives us a sense of hope, a sense that something bigger is happening out there than what we can see, which is especially important in times like this when there are so many reasons for despair.”
Here is a recent touching example of synchronicity, that a student sent Ashton, (her yoga teacher and friend):
“There’s these crazy moments when things align and you know there’s something greater than you. Tonight my boyfriend and I broke up for good. The reason I started going to yoga was to get skinny to keep up with him. January of last year, I went through 10 studios, 8 Groupons, 40 lbs, 4 sizes and during those adventures I found HYU, the best place that’s ever happened to me.I got on Facebook to distract myself with news feed and Karin had a post on the top of it about the 21 Day Habit, saying “Life is Good.” The year that my dad died he said that like once a week and that saying is huge with in my family because of him.The sense of peace knowing I had found that special place I always looked for, and little “God shots” like seeing Karin’s post make me know this hard stuff just had to lead to something so much greater. Thank you for being on this journey, motivating me, drying my tears and being just this beacon of sun in my life.” Krystle
Take a moment to think about your own life, and where and when serendipity occurs. Begin to know that these are real insights that can lead you to manifest the life you desire. I love when I am in the flow of life and I’m aware enough to experience this magical dance with the Universe. So the next time you’re thinking about a friend and the phone rings and they’re on the line, you’ll know the Universe just sent you a little wink or as Krystle wrote, a “God shot” and be open to the possibilities in that moment, follow your heart wherever it takes you.
My sister passed away two days ago. It was just a little over a year since she was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer. Weird how it seems like yesterday that she called to tell me.
I didn’t know I would cry this much, I guess you can’t run out of tears. I haven’t cried this much since my parents passed within six months of each other, nine years ago. You don’t realize the depths of your sorrow, deep into your gut, until the finality of a life is right there… She’s gone.
I had just finished teaching class, when my brother-in-law called me with the news. I felt so overcome with guilt. “I should have been there, I should have called her, I didn’t get to say goodbye, I didn’t get to tell her I loved her, I’m sorry, Please forgive me…. I was with grief, unable to speak, I hung up and collapsed in a pile of tears. I felt a hug from one of my teachers, comforting me with her own wisdom acquired from her father’s recent passing. She listened, I cried and when we finally let go, we were both dripping wet in tears and sweat.
My sister said from the beginning she wasn’t going to fight, that she didn’t have the energy, that she was too scared and too old. I did my best to convince her otherwise, even getting angry at one point but she was set. She said she had seen enough women her age go through treatment, be sick the entire time and end up dying anyway. She wanted to enjoy whatever time she had left.
I was so upset with her because I thought she was giving up too easy, it seemed selfish. I asked her, “What about your husband and your daughter? They need you…” I also thought to myself, “and what about me? I need you.” It was this same selfish type of thinking on my part that caused her to always take a backseat to life and I was the one trying to guilt her into it. I was wrong, so wrong… But this time was different. She stood her ground. Honestly I didn’t realize until now what a valiant and courageous decision it was.
My sister was a supermom who always put herself last. She took care of her kids and her kids friends. Later on she focused on her grand kids, all her friends and neighbors, really at the expense of herself.
Reality was, that she finally made a decision to put herself first on the day she decided she would not go through treatment. For the first time in a long time that she would focus on her own happiness. In the past year she did some things and visited some places that she really loved. And when her body finally gave up, she wasn’t scared anymore and she let go graciously and with dignity.
I really do know better than to think to know what is best for another person? Why would I think, I knew what was right for her? I regret not supporting her decision to live what time she had left on her own terms. It’s just the way I see the world… to never, ever give up, to keep going, to have faith.
The next morning I received a text from the teacher who comforted me. After lovingly listening to me yesterday as I beat myself up, she knew from her own experience it was the wrong road to go down.
“Karin I had a dream this morning that I wanted to share with you. I dreamed that my dad was alive and my mom was gone instead and that was more heartbreaking on so many levels. Sometimes we can focus on what we should have done to those who should have had more love who are gone, we forget to realize how much love was given to us by others who are still here. I realized instead of focusing on missing my dad and what I could have done, the answer was to spread more love to people who have helped me feel that love I wanted to share myself. I would feel infinitely more guilty if I do not reciprocate the love my mom has given me while she is still here. So please instead of feeling any guilt we must learn a lesson and let go, remember you have so much love in your life and the answer is just to love ten times fold, not feel sorry.”
She text me later to say she never has insightful dreams, she’s usually being chased or on an adventure somewhere and that she thought she dreamed it so she could tell me.
We are all here to help each other, only a few months ago I listened and comforted her using the wisdom I received from my parents passing.
In the depths of our sadness does come our evolution. There is a new angel in heaven and a wiser soul on earth. Thank you Linda for the lesson of love… Thank you for always caring for me and my family, for the phone calls, the simple gifts and simple life. Please know I love you so much and always will…
The lesson to learn is to love right now… ten times fold.
Karin xx
P.S. Thank you to everyone who called, messaged and spoke
to me with kindness and prayers. I am grateful for your friendship.
Christmas is my favorite time of the year. Christmas lights and family gatherings, it really is a time of good cheer. As we get closer to Christmas though it can become a little bit stressful with shopping and parties and finding rest too. Crowded stores and short tempers, become the perfect Petri dish for for negativity.
This year I am going to try something new that will take me right up to Christmas. I just finished reading Will Bowen’s A complaint Free World and I’m excited to take the 21 Day Challenge. No complaining for the next 21 days. http://www.acomplaintfreeworld.org/
Here is one of my favorite stories titled, “Thank You for Everything”
The story is told about a woman Zen master named Sono who taught one very simple method of enlightenment. She advised everyone who came to her to adopt an affirmation to be said many times a day, under all conditions. The affirmation was, “Thank you for everything. I have no complaint whatsoever.”
Many people from all arenas of life came to Sono for healing. Some were in physical pain; others were emotionally distraught; others had financial troubles; some were seeking soul liberation. No matter what their distress or what question they asked her, her response was the same: “Thank you for everything. I have no complaint whatsoever.” Some people went away disappointed; others grew angry; others tried to argue with her. Yet some people took her suggestion to heart and began to practice it. Tradition tells that everyone who practiced Sono’s mantra found peace and healing.
Are you with me? Let’s make a difference in our own life and the lives of those around us by being positive. We know that negativity and complaining spreads like a wildfire! So let’s make a difference this holiday season. Thinking before speaking…When we think before we speak, that little pause is all we need to create the happy, joyful life we want, filled with positivity and awareness.
As we jump in with both feet to the beautiful month of November, we focus on Gratitude. Hot Yoga University is offering a 21 Day Gratitude Habit. Studies show there is no better way to increase happiness than to be thankful for what you already have. Setting an intention as you step on the mat and finding time to be still to reflect on gratitude during your practice will definitely change your life!.
How important is it to our students to practice gratitude? Well… we ran out of cards on the first day! The students couldn’t wait to get their gratitude cards and hang them up on the wire outside the yoga room. After class, sweaty blissful yogis can be seen writing down their gratefulness for the day; “my family,” “my God,” “my yoga teacher,” “my health” etc..
What is the top reason why living with a grateful heart so important for our well-being?
Gratefulness = Connectedness
By being grateful we feel more connected to our family, our work and most importantly, more connected to our spirituality. Our gratefulness ultimately connects us to our source and with that Divine connection we are free to live our life in a way that has depth and meaning. Knowing that our blessings come from a source greater than us but is also a part of who we are, creates a faith in us that ultimately leads to more abundance and happiness in our life.
Living with gratitude for every experience in our life, even the ones we find challenging creates an environment of health, wellness, positiveness, growth and evolution on our journey.
Here is one of my favorite Rumi poems:
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
~Jelaluddin Rumi,
What Rumi is so eloquently expressing, is something we already know… Life is all part of a perfect plan. So have faith, be grateful and enjoy the journey.
When opportunities present themselves, we have two choices; we can say yes or we can say no.
After teaching an extra sweaty hot yoga class a few weeks ago and comparing it to a sweat lodge, one of my students, who is Native American asked me if I wanted to sweat with him?
“In a real sweat lodge I asked?”
“Yes!”
Without hesitation I jumped at the opportunity, “When can we do it? ”
We set up a day , I invited my teachers and some friends and we were set.
The evening of the Sweat Lodge as I arrived they were just getting the rocks ready. I thought how perfect is this? I get to watch the process from the ground up; the way each rock was selected put on the pallet and then how the branches were stacked to make a bonfire to heat the rocks.
As we all sat gathered together waiting for the rocks to heat up, it felt so peaceful on the reservation.
I said to one of my teachers what a beautiful life this was. The big yellow crescent moon hanging low in the sky and coyotes playing off in the distance. It is a life very different than the one I am living. I live in a neighborhood with houses all in a row and a road down the middle. I like to sit in my backyard and look up at the trees and it’s nice but it’s not wide open space.
The spiritual leader who was going to run the ceremony didn’t show up, so the fire builder called his Grandmother and asked her if she would lead it and she agreed.
I was excited to be in the company, wisdom and energy of his Grandmother. This Native Amercian woman, mother of 4 grandmother of 15 and great grandmother of 22 children arrived and took charge right away, “no water, no jewelry and no leaving, once we begin.”
She explained to us that this was a huge exception to allow non-natives into their Sacred space. This is something that just isn’t done, but because my student invited me, she allowed it.
I could sense her uneasiness as she looked at all of us. “There is a dress code you know, long skirts for women and covered up”. I looked down at my basketball shorts and tank top thinking this is not going to work.
It was time to go in… As we entered the sweat lodge we were asked to say “All my relations” meaning “All my relatives” or that “we are all related” It is a prayer of Harmony and oneness with all forms of life; plants birds, other people, mountains, rivers and sky.
We crawled in through the small opening and sat in a circle around the rock pit. Once we all were in, the flap door was closed and it was pitch black inside!
I closed my eyes and then opened my eyes and there was no difference…there was only darkness! I felt a little scared because I couldn’t see my teachers and I wanted to make sure they were safe. I had to let go of that fear and simply be present.
I began to smell the aroma of Sage that the Grandmother burned by dropping it on the rocks and I could feel the heat rising as I breathed it in to my lungs.
It would have been easy at that moment to let my mind get the best of me, but I stayed present and listened as she explained the ceremony; 4 rounds, at the beginning of each round the door flap would open and 10 more rocks would be added to the pit.
If we wanted to get out, we had to say “all my relations” and they would open the door.
She told us her story and struggles as a Native American Indian woman living on the reservation and how the “people on the other side of the road” meaning “us” took away so many things from her people and then she began to pray. She poured water on the rocks and the steam and heat filled the sweat lodge.
Round 1 was to pray for the unborn and newborn. I thought of my grand kids just beginning their life journey and of my friends with babies and sent prayers of health and abundance to them.
“I bent forward to find some relief from the heat and the sweat poured off my face and into my hands.”
At that moment someone called out “All my Relations” and just as Grandmother said would happen, the door flap opened and she was free to leave.
I thought to myself, I can do this, I reached over to where my friend was sitting and we found each other’s hand and squeezed it, briefly leaning together to re-affirm that we were alright.
At just that moment the round ended and the door opened. The fresh air and the porch light made it’s way in to the small opening in the sweat lodge. I looked around to see if everyone was still upright. I didn’t have my glasses on, making it very challenging. “I whispered, is everyone ok?” I heard whispers back, “yes”.
Round 2: 10 more rocks coming in.
This round was to pray for children and young adults. Grandmother prayed for her large family. I thought of my own children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews and sent prayers out for them.
Each time she poured the water on the rocks it sent the sound and steam throughout the sweat lodge. I could feel the sweat pouring off from every part of my drenched body.
If I stayed out of my head I would be fine, so I stuck with that plan.
The round was over and Grandmother asked for a water jug that she had inside the house. They brought it in and she poured some of the water on the rocks and then drank from the jug and them passed it to her left.
“Ahhhh water coming my way,” I thought to myself. She had softened, thank goodness from her original rules and was taking it easy on us non-natives. It felt awesome to drink and then to pass it on, like we were all part of the same family.
Round 3: We prayed for healing. As Grandmother prayed for so many in her family her tears and trembling voice touched my soul. I too prayed, but silently for my own family’s health and healing.
As she sang her Native songs her brother joined in. It was nice to hear another voice singing. More water on the rocks and more heat in the lodge.
Round 4: Prayer for the elders. I thought of my parents who have been gone for 8 years now. I still feel very close to them and miss their physical presence in my life so much.
I do see them in my dreams quite often and it feels as if they are still here, happy and healthy.
Round 4 ends and the door flap opens, the summer air feels cool against my sweat covered body and drifts in as we are told to exit one at a time.
When we got outside, we lined up so as each person exited they would shake the hand and or hug each person in the line, until the last person exited which was the Grandmother. She looked weak from the ceremony, she was the closest to the rock pit the entire time, I had scooted way back in the beginning, to the edge of the lodge to escape the heat.
She came out and immediately sat down on a tree stump that was right outside the sweat lodge. The ceremony seemed to be spiritually healing yet physically draining for her.
After being in her presence, listening to her story and hearing her prayers I saw her in a different light. I now understood her hesitancy to let us in. I went over to her and hugged her and thanked her again for the opportunity to experience something so sacred. She never looked up at me, but smiled and nodded her head.
We all sat around afterwards feeling very cleansed and refreshed, Grandmother asked that in the future when we heard people talk about Indians on the reservation, that we stand up for them, knowing their struggles and seeing their truth tonight.
I nodded and thought the same thing with us, perhaps after spending three hours in a sweat lodge with the “people” who took away their land and their water~ pretty much preventing them from living the life their ancestors lived, and observing our respect and gratitude, that she has a better feeling about us non-natives. Even more so, I hoped that she found some healing of the past.
I am so grateful to my student for inviting me to share in his culture. Each of us came away with different gifts from the sweat lodge experience.
I came away with a greater understanding and compassion for the Native American people, their struggles and their zest to live their life true to their ancestry.
So the next time you have a choice to do something new, even if it scares you, go for it! You’ll be grateful you did!
Karin xx
I saw this photo the other day and it made me think of how often we see the word forgive or forgiven. “I forgive you”, “Will you forgive me” or “I have forgiven you.” The word FORGAVE made me feel happy.
I have always found it easy to forgive others. Growing up as the middle child, I liked being the peacemaker, it came naturally.
I’ve experienced many nurturing, loving relationships in my life and also some challenging ones. It was the challenging ones that gave me the greatest lessons.
Some lessons in forgiveness were heart-wrenching. In the end all of them helped me expand my heart by seeing the other person’s point of view.
How did I do it? By staying present and owning my part in the success and or failure of each relationship, these life experiences helped to catapult me to a higher level of consciousness and a healthier version of my current self.
Honestly how can we get upset when a friend, co-worker, partner, spouse or child; doing their best, do something to upset us? Realize that each soul has its own path and its own journey to evolve and each person is right where they should be for them.
Is it possible to forgive too quickly? My friends have said that I do and that I shouldn’t be so quick to make amends but I would rather risk looking a fool and working towards forgiveness, than staying the victim stuck in the past, unable to authentically and gratefully, enjoy life in the present.
Life gives us many opportunities to forgive or not. Gandhi got it right when he said:
“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”
How can we learn to forgive? We can start by owning our part when something happens. Then to do our best to see the person and situation through the eyes of compassion. When we see with compassion we are coming a loving space where healing is possible.
By owning our part and naturally look within, the ability to forgive our selves will be revealed or not. If we cannot forgive our selves, we will have a very challenging time forgiving others. It is a common scenario to hold our self to such a high standard of being perfect, that we fall short in our own eyes.
Although we know at a deeper level that our current thoughts of inadequacy are not true, by staying on this path our resistance is lowered until we no longer have the strength to argue with them. This depressed way of thinking eventually seeps into the way we interact with others, preventing us from the clarity needed for resolution and forgiveness.
It is vital to our health and the health of our relationships that we find positive solutions to our feelings of anger, resentment and self-pity. These negative thoughts can become ingrained and as my husband says,
“Without the fantasy, there is no fairy tale”
So instead, we stay stuck in the past and this thinking requires a ton of energy that instead could be used for good. Just think about all you’ll gain by moving forward and all you will gain by creating a healthy sense of self.
So begin by loving yourself today, perceived shortcomings and all. Inhale compassion and exhale the ideas of perfection. Let it become possible for you to come down from the high pedestal you put yourself on long ago.
Let go of the hurt, the baggage and the pity and replace it with love, compassion and strength and move on.
And when someone does something that you feel is wrong, you’ll find that place and the space within your happy healthy, compassionate heart, and you’ll be able to say “I forgave” 🙂
It will feel so good!
Spending time with friends brings great happiness but what role does our yoga practice play in enjoying and even creating friendships naturally?
“You are, or will become, the average of the five people you associate with the most.” – Brian Carruthers
Yoga reminds us that to have a friend we have to be one.
The first person that we see in the mirror is our self.
“Hi there friend!”
Yoga gives us the opportunity to get to know ourselves again. We can fall in love with ourselves over and over again each time we step on the mat, in a love affair that never ends. As we “re-remember” how awesome we are, we become our own best friend and this feeling naturally flows off the mat and into our life as we easily look forward to getting to know and encourage our friends at a deeper level too.
Yoga gives us the gift of self acceptance.
This is a very necessary gift because most of the time we are seeing our self “at our worst,” having just rolled out of bed, messy hair, still sleepy or dragging ourselves in after a trying and tiring day at work, to save our sanity!
If we can find acceptance in this capacity, we can accept others too!
As we grow more comfortable in our own skin while on our mat, it becomes just as easy to accept our friends as they are too, without judging them or trying to change them, simply enjoying their presence.
How beautiful it is, to be in the company of those who love us for who we are.
Yoga reminds us that there is more to us than what we see in the mirror.
The mirror in the yoga room is a powerful tool for transformation. It is a “metaphysical mirror.”
Looking at our self in the mirror can be uncomfortable at first, but worth every minute of it. Over time we begin to like and then to love our own reflection.
As we love our self more and more, the light from within, our true Self, begins to shine through. This is our Spirit, this is who we really are; a soul, immortal and eternal.
The realization that our body is simply the container for our soul and not who we really are, makes it easy to look past the reflection of others and to even interact with them at a much deeper level.
Our yoga practice gives us an opportunity not to speak, but to simply listen, for an hour.
By being silent and not speaking for an hour a day, we begin to hear the small still voice inside us. This still voice that begins as a quiet whisper can become like bullhorn to get our attention and it is a guide to all of our hearts desires.
By finding the stillness within we become better listeners in our friendships.
We begin to be fully present in our friendships; not feeling the need to interrupt, to look away or to get distracted. Ultimately this creates a bond of comfort and care by being there for our friends in their time of need.
Our yoga practice inspires us to live our yoga off the mat.
At the end of each class the teacher says Namaste’ and we respond in the same way.
Namaste’ is an ancient Sanskrit blessing. We are sent out into the world to live in a way that is a blessing to others.
To be able to see the Divine in our self first and then through our practice to be beautifully reminded to look for and see the Divine in our friends is the ultimate gift of our practice.
“I honor the place in you where the Universe resides,
I honor the place in you
of Love, of Truth, of Light and of Peace.
And when you are in that place in you,
and I am in that place in me,
there is only One of us.”
“If you don’t see God in all, then you can’t see God at all.”~ Yogi Bhajan
What are your thoughts on how yoga helps to build friendships?
Epic Life Yogi 